Monday 27th April – 1.15pm
I have been putting off writing this post for a few days now because I don’t want to anger the medication Gods and have sods law wreak havoc on my broken little body.
But I have to admit, I am starting to feel better. The nausea I had been experiencing leveled out to some nasty indigestion (the kind where you burp and sick in your mouth, unpleasant but not accompanied by the waves of rolling sea sickness I had been experiencing) and seem to have now stopped almost entirely. The general mist of anxiety in every situation seems to have leveled up to just my usual amount of anxiety and over thinking, the amount I was experiencing before I began the medication change. I am imagining the little Venlafaxine Vikings storming my neurotransmitters, making a shield wall and blocking all my good chemicals from dispersing, draining out my pores to be washed down the drain with other grime and sweat, wasted before they could fortify my sanity.
I’m hoping this has a building effect and continues to improve my level of general comfort and peace over the next week or so. Tomorrow, Tuesday 28th, marks three weeks since I started the new meds which is the time frame I was given by Elspeth for feeling better. I can say with only a small amount of trepidation that I am feeling less like a previously untraveled Victorian on a ship during a weeks terrible mid-ocean storm while suffering from an inner ear infection and a nasty case dropsy. Long may it continue. I hope soon to be able to make it to work or to the supermarket without any rumblings of anxiety welling from the depths of my loins. I don’t hope to be fixed, only maintained, managed.